I don't know

I don't know how to live with this. I'm tired of hiding with my head in the sand, but I can't keep suppressing these screams that build up every day. Its like there is a war going on in my head. I don't know what to do.

I still put my hair up before I get out of bed, just like I did in the army before morning formation every day.

They lie when they say God never gives you more than you can handle.

My heart has been broken for years now, and I am still waiting for the healing to start.

I don't know what to do. I really don't.

This is not the world I would have chosen to be born into, and I can't make it be the one I need. Whoever thought free will was a good idea ought to have been shot.

I'm running around in circles, because I can't escape, I can't get in my car and just drive. Everywhere I go there I am. Not fair. I'm lost, and I haven't left the house.

Don't anyone dare tell me it will get better. It only gets better when its about to get worse.