Nervous breakdown. My therapist told me not to write in my blog for the last week, and to avoid "introspection".
Having major panic attacks, and unable to cope with them with my usual methods. Near constant anxiety. Nightmares so bad, I wake up soaked in sweat. I can't even watch movies or tv, because I can't concentrate. I can't seem to focus even on reading which sucks so hard. Books have been a constant companion for me ever since I could toddle around on my own.
I need to relax in the worst way, and other than drugging myself into a zombie like state with my meds, I've no idea how to do that. This is the worst it's been in more than a year. It was also totally unexpected.